My First How To Column.....Fingerblasting at a Concert

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Raping a Rapist

I'd say the two worst things in life are child abuse/neglect and rape. Well since Kobe is too old, the Celtics have decided to give him a taste of his own medicine and rape him. Yeah, he has been scoring and pretending to be a top tier all first team defender, but, he is about to be shown the door by the Celtics twice in 3 years. It's clossssinnnggg time........and by the looks of it...the "best closer" in the league, well, just look at this picture to my left.

What could possibly be a better feeling then raping a rapist. Go ahead blame it on the supporting cast again. Just like the Heat, Cavs, and Magic did. Yeahhhhh.....in da face.

We heading to bars around the Garden tonight. Let's wrap it up boys just like daddy said. Kobe should be made to play in that outfit. Raping fuck.

I can't wait to live in LA at some point in my life and fight everybody. LET'S GO CELTICS!!!!!

In other news.......

BP is shitty and will be going out of business soon. Good job with that.

The new Iphone comes out in less than a month....i'll be getting that.

I saw the movie Trainspotting finally, that is some rediculous stuff. I know I always say I'll try anything once, but, god dam.

Revolutions per minute is an incredible CD.

www.dropbox.com is also fuego. I signed up for that shit instantly.

Ummmm....fuego OUT

SHMACCKINNN BITCHES IN DA FAAAAAAACE

I've posted so many status updates on facebook that I've decided to stop the madness and write a god damn motherfuckin blog. Holy vaginals that was a great way to show the Lebronda the exit. Will he ever win? I DONT CARE!!!! The Celtics will.

I know The C's and I have had our differences this year. I admit that. I was down on a few players and didn't think we had it. Well i'll be dipped in shit and rolled in bread crumbs cuz they proved your boy wrong. And your boy couldn't be happier about it.

This series has made me so god damn happy. Not only did we win the series that the NBA and Ref's absolutely did not want us to, but we smacked bitches in da face while doing it. Floppy haired Verajew got raked IN DA FACE! Mo mediocre at best Williams got kicked IN DA FACE! All by innocent little Rondo. Who just so happened to rape you with his skills as well IN DA FACE!

Orlando next? C,mon. They barely squeeked by with Big Baby as our starting PF. HAHAHHA. Welcome to Garnett's world Rasheed Lewis. That match-up is ours. Rondo will continue to rape the opposing point guard's in the face. Jaqueer is no match. They have the better center. Vince and RejuviRayRay is sort of a wash...but in reality...I'd much rather have Ray Allen. Becuase, we are probably going to hit him IN DA FACE once and he will cry and sit for a few games.

AHHhhhhhh today feels so good. I wanna bottle this up and have it with me. My roomates and I recorded the post game press confrences so we can watch Lebron in a state of depression over and over. I can't wait for him to be a Knick so I can hate him even more. I love to hate him. hahhahahah What a pussy.

In other news..........Iron Man 2 was great. My girlfriend is hot. And did I mention the Celtics won?

Love life.....feugo out.

Horsecock Productions

So I'm at work and G-Chattin it up per usual. All I can think is how awful this is. So my mind wanders.............................

Why couldn't my family be rich. This way I could be a washup-up drug addict and make sex tapes for money. Shit, atleast I don't have to work. You know there are people in the world who feel bad for "people" like Lyndsay Lohan. This chick has been rippin qualudes for years, gettin paid to look like a crack whore. Follow me around with cameras all day. Watch me fuck and scratch my ass, I don't care. I'm PAID SON. As you see from the title of this blog I have a name for my porn production company already. It's M in the B.

.......................and back to real life.

So last night there was a dilemma at my house. I was recording the shitty Bruins for my roomate as well as American Idol for my other "roomate". The people who make directv make it so you have to watch one of these programs if you are recording two at the same time. Shitty. But, a fact nonetheless. Two reasons I couldn't watch the Bruins. I don't enjoy their efforts nor do I truly enjoy hockey. Wifey was there as well and she would rather play with the pet mice then watch hockey. So needless to say, I was stuck watching American Idol. What the fuck? That over-exaggerated, over-hyped, exponentially talentless show makes me angry. I swear the first four people that "sang" were nothing better than a local karaoke show. These people are the top 11 contenders. You know what, I actually know for a fact that some local karaoke shows are far better than the performance these asshats put on. We put a movie on halfway through. Fuck that show. Never again. Sorry Ellen.

Fuego..out.

Who are these people?

Two things...

1. What the fuck is the deal with these stupid girls wearing animal hats. Have you seen this? Chicks walking around with these god damn hats with little horns or ears on them. They have cat ones, lion ones, wutever the fuck. Is this taking over as the new way to express your inner fucktard? Is this the new goth look? I'll wear baggy jeans and a god damn kitty hat. What is wrong with you.

2. Boots. Woman's rubber rain boots. I think we will look back at pictures of these year in history and not comment on the unemployment rate or how we put the first black man in office, but on the atrocity that has become woman's boots. Bitch, you look ugly. That is all I can say. I don't get it. These rediculous desings that look like something I created through an Iphone App are all over these huge hideous boots. I hate to say it but I liked the shitty UGHhhhhhh phenomanon better than this.

I know I come off as angry. I'm actually in a pretty good mood despite the weather, lack of sleep, and mounting debts. Shit, what do I have to complain about. Well, besides hats and boots......

March Madnessssssssssssss! Gotta love it. Got my brackets filled out. Cuse' in one and Tucky' in the other. Gimme that money!

Fuego, out

Old Men Can't Jump

Well, today I've decided to impress my Awesome GF and buy us two very expensive tickets (15 bux a pop) to go see a bunch of older gentleman play basketball. They are taller and blacker then most rec league players, hence the hike in price. They even have a large building in which they built a court for these baby boomers. The elder statesman all wear green tanks that say the word "Celtics" on them. I don't really know what the big hype is. I just know my GF likes to go. So my plan is to get hammered and somehow a hottub appears like in that movie thats coming out and we can go back a few years to when these green grumpy old men could run and jump high.

Celts game baby. Can't wait.

Anyways.....the corporate world is so shitty. Everybody is above you and no matter how many dicks you suck on your way through the day, there is another one waiting for you the next day. Everything is this huge important issue. But, when you have a god damn issue and ask some huge important guy a question, you don't get a motherfucking answer for days. Get off your ass you RICH FUCK and answer us peasants. Is it really that hard to write three words in an email that you obviously know the answer to.
O well...

Live Hard Die Free.....suck it

Fuego..out

Let's GOOOOO

So the trade deadline has come and gone...and the C's picked up the the tiny dinasaur aka the man who looks most like fitty cent besides Chancey Stuckey in the NBA aka Nate Robinson. Don't get it Convilleuted, I think it's a solid move by the Celts. What were the Celtics lacking? Youth, speed, and scoring off the bench. This little man brings all of that. Not to mention he is a PG to back-up Rondo who can actually dribble the damn ball. Do they need more? Probably. But, it looks like we are banking on the Big 3 turning it up in the playoffs. Ray-Ray seemed to be back to form last night against the Kobeless Lakers, but the second half was once again awful to watch. Basically, if Kobe is healthy it is a fact we lose that game. Instead of Shitty Sheldon Brown shooting jumpers at the end of the game it would have been Kobe annnnnnddd needless to say we probably lose that game.

But we did squeek out the win. Maybe this will lube the squeeky wheel of the shopping cart full of issues that have epitomized the Celtics season. You know who the thirty pack of toiliet paper that takes up all the room in that shopping cart is? You guessed it. Rasheed Fucking Wallace. I don't even know how Doc still plays him, at all. Did anybody see that god dam effort put forth last night. Without looking at the stat line im pretty sure he hit two shots, got a tech, 0 rebounds, and got dunked one twice. This is the only way I can put it Sheed. You wiped the ass of the lakers. You are the TP my friend. Nah fuck that your not my friend. I hate you and your bald spot.

Well, its Friday. Hurricane O'Reilly's tonight. As a wise man once said....SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS....EVERYBODYYYYYYYYY. Go ahead, sing it the way he sings it. I got all of em there.

One other thing. Ice skating is so gay. Not only that but brothers and sisters make out....were not in Kansas anymore.......thanks for the link Nicky. http://deadspin.com/5475245/siblings-get-romantic-in-vancouver


Fuego, out

Six Hundred and Twenty Six Tears

For those of you who knew her for her flashy vents and gridiron bucket of does attitude, for her days as a three doored duck taped delivering machine, and finally her latter days where she wept red tears leaving her mark(tranny fluid) where ever she went; let us pray. O' Mazda be thy name, forth travel was her game, She shall not die, her fumes make you high, her spirit forever untamed.

Just like my GF, I hate to see her go, but I love to watch her leave.

I wish her nothing but engine failure and leaking tranny's in the future(The car not my GF) That poor lady I sold that piece of shit to is in for a real treat. Hopefully she doesn't read my world reknown blog. She'll prob want that G-note back.

...in other news...

Recently I've actually been getting into verbally assaulting the fruitcakes that are into this Lost bullshit. My only fear is that I will begin to use physical force and end up with a lawsuit due to my hatrid for a television show. But you know what? Fuck it. I'll take what's coming to me. It'll be worth it. My dad always told me to fight for what is right. So since I'm right. I will hit all you bitches in the face for loving that show. That show can SMB along with all of its fans.

Go ahead...comment on this post...i dare you...

It's Ya BOY!

It's been a while. I haven't been addicted to sleeping pills or OC's or anything...just living life. But i'm getting back to my nappy roots and decided to involve the people's in my future endeavors.....

Hello people's,

First lets chat sports. The Celtics better send Grey Rey out before we are the Pistons...never gonna get it never gonna get it. We would be fine if we hadn't acquired Rasheed Walker..oops I mean Antoine Wallace...woops again...Rasheed Wallace...the man has hit nothing but backboard on at least one three attempt in every game he has been in this year. And he can't even get 3 rebounds a game. WTF?

Pats - Brady > Manning's combined = me likey

Bruin's = I don't give a fuck...and its a good thing...because with all the hype at the beginning of the season....I'm pretty sure I just heard they had lost something like 10 in a row.

Sox - Bill Hall?

As Foley's angry higher-ups would say at the end of a voicemail in which he is furious because Foley fucked shit up.......Anywayssssss.....

What's good with the people's? People been getting jobs/promotions yet? Any back babies poppin out from the vast catalog of readers? How about tight fitting clothing guy....still wearing clothes that don't fit while doing no work and making cappucino's all day?

I'm back bitches......this is the first day of the rest of our lives...or whatever...and I want you all to take a step back and Carpe deezzzz nuuuuuuuutssss.